Duck Duck Safari Pre-Order Offer - ends Nov 30

Sweet! Order Duck Duck Safari by November 30 and get a free extra duck of your choice, plus 2 promo cards!

Thanksgiving wrap-up

Went to La Grange for Thanksgiving. Successfully made a ton of sweet potato chips while Lee taught Michael and her mom Dominion. Also played: Can't Stop, and The Kids of Catan.

Things I Don't Give You Permission To Do, Vol 1: Use the Taser

News article with commentary: 10-year-old girl tasered, with mom's permission.

As a kid, I had a few run-ins with electric fences used to keep cattle in, and I can report that being shocked sucks, sucks, sucks.

I remember once playing a game over at my friend Jim's house, and running full-tilt-boogie into a wire stretched about thigh-high. I was lucky that I hit it sideways and not straight on, but I can still remember the twin traumas of the shock and bouncing off the ground when I came away from the wire.

(In other gaming news, played Dominion with Lee a couple nights ago, played a modified Ticket To Ride with Alex, and played Dominion with Beth and Lee last night.)

Morning gaming with Alex: For Sale played as a 2 player

Yesterday, Alex woke up and got dressed early for kindergarten, and wanted to look at For Sale (technically speaking, it supports 3-6 players). I removed 12 cards of each type and dealt us each $22, and we began to play. It's an auction game, and she was quick to overbid, using up all her cash.

She still won, 76-74.

Today we set up and played through about 3 turns of Blue Moon City. Alex is thrilled by the idea of calling dragons and finishing buildings.

I have already started to see holiday gift guides go up.

How to read bedtime stories to 3 girls (for fathers everywhere)

You're going to need three little girls. I recommend conceiving them as closely spaced as you and your wife can manage. Remember, the sooner you're done, the sooner they can move out of the house. Assume the children are already all dressed for bed, with teeth brushed/flossed/fluorided. You may as well assume you've had two beers; you're about to earn them.

Select a book. This will require the patience of Job, as no two children wish to read the same book at the same time. They will shout suggestions and attempt to push past you to get to the bookshelves. If any books are in hand, they will be grabbed, and a shoving match will result. Mediate the argument by ruling in favor of the child who is being the calmest, in order that the child who is already agitated will become a tornado of anxiety and sobbing. Reassure her that her choice will be read next, although you secretly suspect that this will not happen.

Cautiously sit on the bed or on the couch, being careful not to expose your back to any child, lest you be climbed faster and more painfully than a fratboy's ladder at the Playboy Mansion. Guard your privates and open the book. This is the signal for all of your children to dive at your lap, in an effort to gain every iota of your precious love for themselves. If you are struck in the privates, gently admonish your children, using the comical nickname you have for your abused genitals. I call mine "the package," but you are free to select your own.

Once all of your love has been gathered and the three children are each seated on one leg, with no sharing (implementation left to the reader), begin reading. As bony elbows are driven into your ribs, announce the title of the book, substituting your favorite nonsense into it. Kick it up a notch to retain your sanity. My children delight at the stories of "The Three Little Weasels" and "Goldilocks and the Three Belt Sanders." If your children object, ask them who is reading the story, them or you? Be assertive, but recall that your middle daughter will shriek and dive from your lap to run across the room and hide in the alcove between her dresser and the closet at the slightest provocation.

When the story is finished, renege on your earlier commitment to read more stories, as daughter the youngest is already hair-pullingly exhausted and can't stop yanking the book from your hands. Take your youngest daughter to bed and as your older daughters kick the adjoining wall in frustration at your departure. Ensure it's dark enough that if your youngest flails at you with a stuffed giraffe, you will be struck in the nose.

Savor this time. She's too little to talk back.