Sunday, December 17, 2006

The rest of the weekend - Reynolds & Reynolds Christmas party

Lee and I got our friend Emily to babysit, and we went off to the UCS, oops, Reynolds & Reynolds Christmas party. Here's how it works:
  1. Free food
  2. Free booze
  3. ???
  4. Profit!
It was up at the Wyndham Greenspoint. We were able to get a discounted room rate, and I even got up there and checked in early enough to get our room preferences.

My old co-workers were there, and I got a lot of back-slapping and hand-shaking from the rank-and-file, and some of the supervisors.

The D.J. at the party sucked and sucked. To give you an idea, a few years ago, the Beach Boys played at the UCS Christmas party. Yes, the actual Beach Boys, featuring actual Brian Wilson on drums, and the actual grandchildren of the lead singer, whose name I can't remember, but I'll call him Beardy. As they left the stage, I shouted, "We love you, Brian! Keep taking showers!" This was the evil, no-fun opposite of that.

This D.J. was whiny about no one dancing, had the music turned up too loud, had the sound levels set to where anyone on the mike sounded like Charlie Brown's teacher, played the Aggie Fight Song, played Vanilla Ice songs, etc. Beardy never would have stood for that.

Lee and I stayed far away from the blare, and sat in the outer hall, feasting and hanging out with Very Intoxicated Co-workers. Topics discussed included:
  • How people's moms made them self-conscious about their bodies
  • How awesome booze is
  • The relative merits of spending $1200 on a new Sig or spending $800 on a titanium driver (probably mostly ironic, but I was in the middle of two conversations and I wasn't sure)
  • How much the D.J. sucked
  • How "Buckles" broke his hand, and what happened next. Ha ha, David. You're just the same as I remember, except injured in a comedic fashion.
  • My new job, specifically that it is "good, and that's about all I'll say."
After I caught myself singing along to David Alan Coe's version of Steve Goodman's "You Never Even Called Me By My Name," a.k.a. The Perfect Country Western Song, I knew it was time for us to go brush our teeth and crash. Full lyrics here, by the way.

In the morning, we got up, ate the bagels I packed, and then went to Panera to have coffee and eat more. Lee had a pastry, and I ate more bagels.

After that, we went home, and eventually everyone took a nap, and then we went to the Olive Garden, where everyone ate a lot except Alex, who mostly drank lemonade. When we were headed home, she let us know, "Need more lemo-ade, Mommy! Need more lemo-ade, Daddy!"

So we told her the straw was "all used up" and promised her lemonade at an unspecified future time, instead. Good parenting is all about supervision when needed, discipline when required, love all the time, and believable lies when it's convenient.


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